Man, we really suck with the updating, don't we? The following is a different post that Sheri wrote. We actually forgot her login info so I'm just copying and pasting it from an email she sent to me. Since my last post I have finally moved into my new apartment and I'm still trying to get settled and Sheri is two days away from taking her state exam to become a licensed real estate agent. It has been busy kiddies but I did get a private message from someone asking if we're alright-and aside from a tiff here or there we are doing well.
"Last weekend my niece was married. At the tender age of only 22 she had decided to start her life with a very nice guy. As the days leading up to the big day approached I was texting a friend of mine of many years who had worked with my sister during the years that she was trying to get pregnant with my niece. We would laugh about the strange bottle that was in the refrigerator at work…"wait, don’t touch that…its breast milk". As we laughed about it during the week she would recall the days of when she and my brother were dating and would go take my niece and nephew up to friendly’s for ice cream and people would think they were one big happy family.
As I took my place in church last week, there was my friend, walking down the aisle to sit behind me. Our eyes met and I could see the glistening of a tear to start. I said to her, don’t start……I had managed to keep my emotions in check but felt like I was about to lose it at any second. She sat directly behind and when my now 27 year old nephew walked past she didn’t even recognize him. He had grown into such a good man, no longer the little boy that they stole away for ice cream with his little sister. As I watched my sister take her place in the pew, soon to be joined by my brother in law I couldn’t help but think about the life that I have ended up with.
My sister and brother in law have battled illness, my sister, cancer specifically, and now they sit there watching one of their children move on with their life. They are two peas in a pod, always there for one another and raising two amazing children. Both have graduated college and seem none the ware for what they had to deal with two parents being sick. Would my children turn out as well, having survived a divorce and a remarriage of their father and a new sibling? I started to think about what I’ve taught my children over the past five years, the mistakes I have made and how at some point I would hope that I have taught them to always have faith that eventually everything is going to be ok.
In the past 5 years I have been unemployed 3 times. Don’t get me wrong, unemployment is not always a bad thing. It makes you reevaluate things. It makes you realize what you miss and what you have to or worse need to, change about yourself. That’s what this bout now is all about.
I’ve worked since the age of 16. My father died when I was 15 and being the youngest of 5, I was the only one still at home. The man that lived across the street from us owned a restaurant and offered me a job answering phones and working the register after school. This job also had the bonus of always having food to take home every day before I left. I started college at 18, around the same time I found a part time job at the mall that I loved. I ended up leaving college a year and a half later to pursue a full time position at that same job and a shot at management.
Little did I know that 28 years later I would still be working retail. Don’t get me wrong, I have for the most part thoroughly enjoyed every job that I have ever worked at. I’ve worked with great people over the years, made some very long time friends and have made a nice living for myself. But when do you say “enough already”. When do you start to realize that you’re never around for your kids, that sometimes it’s a battle to get a day off because the boss that you hate controls your schedule. Well for me, it was the 28th year. This is the first year in 28 that I didn’t work a black Friday. Not gonna lie, it was a little weird not going to bed at 8pm on thanksgiving night because I had to be at work at 3am for a 5am opening. Instead I got to sleep, and just be…..for once….normal.
So, having decided that I have officially had it with retail I decided to what I wanted to do 20 years ago and get my real estate license. After having made this decision I sat my kids down and told them my plan. In the past when I’ve sprung unemployment on them there only concern was would we have to move because maybe I couldn’t pay the mortgage. I have always had a plan when unemployment was eminent and this time was no different. So we sit down to talk and after I tell them what is going on they were actually relieved. “Does that mean you’re gonna be around more mom?” “Absolutely”, I proclaimed and was immediately greeted by a big yay and a hug by my youngest who’s 8. “Good”, the answered I received from my 15 year old. My children are far more resilient than I ever thought they were, I guess they have comfort in knowing that their mother always has them covered, through jobs and unemployment. I have provided some sort of stability in their lives, even after a divorce. I may have sat there last Saturday, looking at my sister and brother in law, envious of what they have and what they have produced. They have always been two, together. I, on the other hand have chosen a different path for myself and my children. And even when things are really lousy and I get mad at myself for some of the decisions I have made, at the end of the day, when my girls are in my room with me and we are laughing together, I know the path I’ve chosen is the right one, for I wouldn’t change it for the world."
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